7 Places to Dispose of a Body in the Gaean Reach

We would never be so indelicate as to suggest that you, as member of a ragtag band of interstellar vengeance-seekers, would ever commit a homicide in the course of your implacable hunt for arch-criminal Quandos Vorn. Yet in the pursuit of this entirely justified enterprise, one might theoretically find oneself saddled with a recently deceased individual whose discovery would inconvenience your crew. Depending on your position in the vast sector of space known as the Gaean Reach, you might consider any of the following spots as places to dispose of incriminating remains.

  1. Crystal Marsh, Nion. The ever-shifting monoliths of this beautiful natural formation (pictured) quickly absorb any matter from the manufactured to the organic, rearranging it on the molecular level.
  2. Energy Fountains, Palmetto Islands, Ys. This laser sculpture provides hours of quiet contemplation to the residents of the area’s many retirement communities. Clients bored with life, or unable to pay for their upkeep, sometimes wander into the beam projectors. (The artist stipulated that no protective barriers obscure the view.) No one bats an eye when one of the beams momentarily fizzes.
  3. Palga Plateau, Koryphon. Inhabitants of this plain, the Wind-runners, object to others flying over their land. They shoot down any and all airborne vessels with their light-cannon. One need merely place the body in a disposable glider or atmospheric torpedo, loft it over the plateau, and let the Wind-runners do the rest.
  4. Port Swaven, Boniface. In this prison processing town, brokers maintain a brisk trade in fresh offworld corpses. With the connivance of corrupt guards these are used to fake convicts’ deaths, allowing them to escape under new identities. No one will find the criminal you seek to get rid of if he’s buried in the grave of an entirely different wrongdoer.
  5. Smugglers City, Terence Dowling’s World. Several competing businesses in this bustling criminal hive refashion corpses into attractive memento mori. Their catalogs offer such choices as keychains, watch fobs, steering mechanism covers, and drink cozies, all guaranteed to resist DNA testing of any kind.
  6. Yink’s Crocodile Park, Old Earth. By centuries-old custom, police officials may not venture into this combination tourist attraction and religious mecca. Acolytes of the Reptile God will baptize you for free in the sacred waters of the Sippewissa River when you provide 50 kg or more of carrion for the delectation of their deity’s earthly avatars.
  7. Zonk’s Star. Any solar orb will utterly incinerate any unwanted biohazards, if you’re willing to steer your space boat close enough. Zonk’s Star, named after a legendary pirate who himself is said to have undergone a so-called “flare funeral”, seems as poetically apt a choice as any.
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